Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Making Lemonade

You can learn something from every experience, good or bad.

Yup. Still trying to put a positive spin on the Sox. Maybe it's because I don't want Dave bugging me to turn that crap off anymore. Maybe it's because I'm not enough of a fan yet to justify being pissed off at the whole team. Whatever the reason, I've decided to learn something from the Sox's atrocious performances of late. Hey, I might soon be the only fan left in Sox Nation. Francona will turn to me for help picking up the pieces.

Here are some of the things I've learned could be going wrong:

1.Pitching. Jonathan Papelbon, the pitcher who promised he was working on varying his pitches, threw 19 pitches last night- all of them four seamed fastballs. Francona, the pitchers need to throw different pitches or the batters will know what to expect. Have righties throw a few with their left. Consider investing in some of those tennis ball slingers I've seen used at dog parks.

2. Pitching again. Daisuke Matsuzaka almost admitted he needed to take Victor Martinez's suggested pitches more instead of shaking him off. Seems like a trust issue to me. Francona, bring the whole team to the woods for a ropes course and trust fall exercises.

3. Yoohoo, Ellsbury, Cameron, where are you? There were four balls hit to the outfield that Jeremy Hermida and Darnell McDonald should have caught, but I don't remember their names on the original roster. What happened to the motto cowboy up? Francona, tell Jacoby Ellsbury and Mike Cameron to "git" back on the field.

4. Run Prevention. a) What the hell is that? and b) Why does everyone know that's your strategy? Isn't this comparable to jumping in a boxing ring and announcing you will only be blocking punches to your
face? Maybe this is why the Yankees don't put a shift on David Ortiz... they figure so what? the Sox are focused on run prevention so we don't need to field every ball perfectly. Francona, call a press conference ASAP, today, right now.

Say only this, "Forget (or some other word that starts with F) run prevention. Yankees, we're coming back tonight to whoop your ass."

See, learning something from a bad experience?*

*Note to self: stay on topic next time.


  1. Will, Spencerport NYMay 18, 2010 at 10:13 AM

    Alli - your comments are spot on. I can't tell you how much I miss Jacoby - I think I will shed tears of joy when he returns. Last night was painful to watch. Ugh.

    So why am I nearly the only person making comments on your stellar blog? I think you need to send the Nation an email with your blog address. We need to cowboy up publicity. Perhaps rent an ad sign on Landsdown street. When you get your book deal please mention me in the footnotes ;-)

  2. Hi Will,

    Not sure why you are the only one commenting, but I really do appreciate that you do. I need to do a little more guerilla-getting-the-word-out by high-jacking the comments sections on other people's blogs, the Globe, etc.

    Unless anyone out there has a better idea... or can break into the Red Sox Nation database and steal everyone's email address.

    As for book deal... not sure anyone would really want more than a page at a time of me :)

    But really, your comments make a big difference to me completing this mission... especially with the Sox kinda sucking.

    Thanks, Alli

  3. Alli -
    I FAITHFULLY read the blog. I don't comment because...well....I'm a Cardinals fan. Baseball is a religion here (similar to what Dave says about Boston) and I've been worshipping the Gods of Baseball my entire life.

    I've learned a few things - one thing being what actually constitutes being in a "save" situation. I also caught one of those things that others busted you out on (a player being in scoring position) but I hate it when people get nutty about a mistake so I just let it fly without comment. Us girls need to stick together!!!!

    Keep up the good work - I'll keep reading and learning!!!


  4. hmmm - I think the "Us girls" was incorrect grammar - but you get the gist. I wouldn't want everyone to think Cards fans are stupid.